The Anxious Therapist

“If you judge other people, you  have no time to love them.” – Mother Teresa

Every person has a story– and it’s not yours.  Similar situations aren’t exact situations.  You don’t know the road another person has traveled… do you really believe that puts you in a position to judge?  Focus on improving your own life so that you have no time to judge the lives of others.  “All we see of someone at any moment is a snapshot of their life: there is riches or poverty, in joy or despair.  Snapshots don’t show the millions of decisions that led to that moment.”

 You may know a person’s face, their name, or what they’re wearing… but you can’t read their mind and you don’t know their story.  Careful what you say about others– it’s more revealing of your own character than theirs.  “Judging a person does not define who they are.  It defines who you are.”  Listen to what others are critical and cynical of, and you can discover what they lack.  The same goes for you.

Don’t criticize what you don’t understand, or what you’re unwilling to understand.  You cannot possibly love or hate something you don’t understand.  How, then, can you judge something you’ve never experienced or someone you’ll never be?  There is no “right” way.  There is my way and there is your way, but there is no “only” way.

It’s OK to remember the past, but it’s not OK to live in it.  Don’t judge a person by their past… they don’t live there anymore.  The most littered pasts can make for the brightest futures.  “Everyone may not be good, but there’s always good in everyone.  Never judge anyone shortly because every saint has a past and every sinner has a future.”

“What others think of you is none of your business.”  Never judge yourself through someone else’s eyes.  They don’t know your pains or your struggles… the same goes for them in your own eyes.  We’re not put in this world to live up the expectations of others.

 “Counting other people’s sins does not make you a saint.”  It’s been said that the most insecure people, the people who know you the least, are the ones who judge the most.  Judge others if you want to be judged; the more time you spend judging others, the more time you leave your own closet open to be examined.  We’re all sinners… “Don’t judge someone because they sin differently than you do.”

“It is easier to fight for one’s principles than it is to live up to them.”  The easiest advice to give, yet the hardest advice to take is your own.  Seek the good in everyone, appreciate a person for where they’ve been and how far they’ve come, and love people for their flaws.  It’s what sets us apart from one another.

“What the superior man seeks is in himself. What the small man seeks is in others.” – Confucius